Gorillaz' 2D and Murdoc on their new celebrity lifestyle.
MORE!, May 2006
Q: We hear you're off to crack America - has all the fame gone to your heads yet?
Murdoc: Hopefully. I mean, that is the point of all this isn't it? To get famous and then start acting like a big tosser. That's what I'm in it for, anyway.
Q: James Blunt got a number 1 over there, are you fans?
Murdoc: There's nothing musical about James Blunt. I think he's a dwarf, short-arse, army boy, freak, nob. I've got no time for him and his soul-sapping songs.
2D: But what do you really think about him, deep down?
Q: Do you think you lot should win more sexy bloke awards like Pete Doherty did at the NME awards?
Murdoc: You'd have to be physically mental to find Pete Doherty the sexiest man alive. I’ve seen tramps crawling out of skips that look better then him.
Q: Nice! So what's the most shocking thing you’ve seen on the party circuit recently?
Murdoc: Champagne colonic irrigation.
2D: Kelly Clarkson.
Murdoc: Not at the same time, though!
Q: Has Paris Hilton tried to chat you up yet?
Murdoc: Of course she has. But until she takes that horrible mask off I'm having none of it.
2D: Er, that's her face.
Murdoc: Really? Oh sorry, I didn't realise.
Q: You performed with Madge at the Grammies - what do you think of her leotards?
Murdoc: Phew! Er, I dunno really. Its hard to have an opinion about a leotard isn't it? I guess it works on her. From the right angle. With the right lighting.
Q: On to other pop royalty. Who'd you most like to work with - Mariah Carey, Pink or Kylie?
Murdoc: Definitely Kylie. She's a cracker. I'd do time for her, seriously.
Q: Have you had girls send knickers to you in the post yet?
Murdoc: I got one pair, so I sent a pair of my pants straight back. After that the whole 'pant trading' kind of ground to a holt.
Q: If you ask Jamie (Hewlett, Gorillaz artist) nicely does he make you more well-endowed?
2D: He's our official photographer so he could do that on the computer, I guess.
Q: And if you play up does he adjust your manhood's accordingly?
2D: I'm getting the impression you think our relationship with Jamie is directly proportional to the length of our manhood, which is a really odd way to judge the value of a friendship.
Murdoc: You're only saying that because you're hung like a baby and Jamie hates you.
Q: Finally, you're, er, very animated. Does that mean you can have sex in really weird positions?
Murdoc: Well, I've never lost a game of naked Twister in my life.
2D: I'm quite a prude really. I certainly don't attempt to do anything that anyone else wouldn't do.
Murdoc: Anyone who has sex with you would be doing it in a weird position anyway. And I'd say I am more adventurous than your average civilian. Circus folk, You name it, I'm up for it!
Murdoc: Hopefully. I mean, that is the point of all this isn't it? To get famous and then start acting like a big tosser. That's what I'm in it for, anyway.
Q: James Blunt got a number 1 over there, are you fans?
Murdoc: There's nothing musical about James Blunt. I think he's a dwarf, short-arse, army boy, freak, nob. I've got no time for him and his soul-sapping songs.
2D: But what do you really think about him, deep down?
Q: Do you think you lot should win more sexy bloke awards like Pete Doherty did at the NME awards?
Murdoc: You'd have to be physically mental to find Pete Doherty the sexiest man alive. I’ve seen tramps crawling out of skips that look better then him.
Q: Nice! So what's the most shocking thing you’ve seen on the party circuit recently?
Murdoc: Champagne colonic irrigation.
2D: Kelly Clarkson.
Murdoc: Not at the same time, though!
Q: Has Paris Hilton tried to chat you up yet?
Murdoc: Of course she has. But until she takes that horrible mask off I'm having none of it.
2D: Er, that's her face.
Murdoc: Really? Oh sorry, I didn't realise.
Q: You performed with Madge at the Grammies - what do you think of her leotards?
Murdoc: Phew! Er, I dunno really. Its hard to have an opinion about a leotard isn't it? I guess it works on her. From the right angle. With the right lighting.
Q: On to other pop royalty. Who'd you most like to work with - Mariah Carey, Pink or Kylie?
Murdoc: Definitely Kylie. She's a cracker. I'd do time for her, seriously.
Q: Have you had girls send knickers to you in the post yet?
Murdoc: I got one pair, so I sent a pair of my pants straight back. After that the whole 'pant trading' kind of ground to a holt.
Q: If you ask Jamie (Hewlett, Gorillaz artist) nicely does he make you more well-endowed?
2D: He's our official photographer so he could do that on the computer, I guess.
Q: And if you play up does he adjust your manhood's accordingly?
2D: I'm getting the impression you think our relationship with Jamie is directly proportional to the length of our manhood, which is a really odd way to judge the value of a friendship.
Murdoc: You're only saying that because you're hung like a baby and Jamie hates you.
Q: Finally, you're, er, very animated. Does that mean you can have sex in really weird positions?
Murdoc: Well, I've never lost a game of naked Twister in my life.
2D: I'm quite a prude really. I certainly don't attempt to do anything that anyone else wouldn't do.
Murdoc: Anyone who has sex with you would be doing it in a weird position anyway. And I'd say I am more adventurous than your average civilian. Circus folk, You name it, I'm up for it!